It seems that especially for women, the emergence of the true self requires one to leave institutions that are repressive. The search for empowerment is driven by a desire to be free...to be fully alive. It is something akin to a chick breaking open a shell or a snake shedding it's skin. If either fails the animal will die. It is exactly how I felt when I left my marriage and subsequently my church. Returning to the church was 'orders from headquarters' and I am back as 'I am' with no apologies for the transformation I have received. I am free to be me and be Catholic. The repressive nature of the hierarchies has ,in my eyes, to do with limited thinking caused by fear. It does not affect me as it used to but I do pray for a lifting of the fear,the need to control and repress and an inflow of the Spirit of Christ. I have compassion as I watch with sadness,men in high places talk out of both sides of their mouth at the same time,causing confusion and disbelief. It is at best sad and at worst, horrifying.I wonder, "Where is their sense of freedom?"
Thursday, February 19, 2009
Today as I was sitting quietly, I heard " I can be Catholic and be me!" I have been reading many emails from people reading my book saying that they they had left their religion of birth because it felt too constricting but after reading my book were invited to rethink their choice. This is one response that I never even considered and I am in awe!
Sunday, February 15, 2009
It is so beautiful this morning.Sofia, our Mother is showering us with tiny white crystals called snow! We so need Her blessing. We had our prayer and healing circle scheduled for today but you know the story line...the best laid plans etc! This is just another teaching in surrender,learning to let go and give thanks! We decided to send an email with all the prayer requests to all the participants and we will pray as a circle but in our own homes. Jesus says that where 2 or more are gathered in His name, He will be with us...we are many more that two! This new way actually invites more people into the circle and that is quite wonderful.
So if you are reading this today,know that lots of healing love is going out into the universe and feel free to join the circle.
Much peace to you today. Enjoy the beauty all around you.
Saturday, February 14, 2009
On Sunday, we had another wonderful gathering to celebrate the publication of my book.
There were more than 90 people, all excited to be there,all filled with enthusiasm and all wanting to read the book or if they had read it, to share it with others. I am now aware that I spent time in prayer preparing myself to face criticism but never thought about receiving such overwhelmingly positive responses. I give thanks to the Mother God who guided me every step of the way!!
My husband and I went up to Calistoga for a couple of days after the party. I really needed to be quiet and have time to rest in the gratitude that filled me. Floating in the naturally warmed mineral pool was the perfect place to give thanks...I felt as though I were floating in Her Womb!
Thursday, February 5, 2009
I believe that everyday is a new adventure and it seems to me that part of the delight I feel is experiencing whatever comes my way as gift! Sometimes that gift is not very well wrapped and I may think that I do not want it.In the past, I have often turned my back on the offering. But I have learned that if I am willing to carefully and lovingly open the 'gift' I will find a treasure. Listening to myself and to others is key to discovering the treasure...listening with love and compassion, listening with a deep desire to hear the truth! I listened to my husband today as he told me that he no longer wanted to feed the dog! I heard in his voice a longing to find the time he needs to finish his work and a need to cut back on some of the things he does around the house. What's the gift,you ask? Well, how about the gift of a happier husband...a good one! I do not mind the job of feeding Emma but until this morning I did not know he did!It will be a new adventure!
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
On Sunday the 31st, we had more than 70 people here to celebrate the publication of my book. It was such a joyous party. People brought flowers,cards and their very cheerful, congratulatory selves! I was busy most of the time,from 4-7 pm, signing books and chatting one on one with people.I continue to be amazed at the positive response from readers.They love the book,are reading it a second time,are doing the reflection questions and passing it on to friends. I am so thankful!
But...I am finding myself wondering when the shoe will drop and I will receive critical responses. Then, I have to sit myself down and say"Pamela, what are you creating with this fear?" I realize that kind of thinking is an old habit that no longer serves me or my readers. I recall that this book was inspired and guided by the Holy Spirit. I ask for the grace to receive whatever comes with gratitude and my ego rests.Blessings, friend!